Sex is probably the best thing the human race has going for them. It’s no surprise the porn industry is one of the biggest markets there is. People love doing it, people love watching other people doing, people love doing it themselves. If you don’t watch porn let me be the first to say you’re missing out. You can pick up some pretty solid pointers or ideas from a good solid porn session. If you do watch porn you know for the most part it couldn’t be farther away from real sex. If you’re expecting all your sexual experiences to be like a porno flick than you are setting yourself up for disappointment. These 30 people decided to share a few of the things that happen during sex that you will never ever see in porn.
Nobody ever says “Sorry but not tonight, I had Taco Bell.”
Asking if she locked the door, getting down to business then hearing the children ask for you. You yell that you are discussing Christmas presents and they need to go back to watching Disney Jr. 2 minutes later kids are pounding on the door but it’s been days since you and your wife have had any time together so you power through. You progress to an advanced missionary position where you each cover your partners ears as to not hear the kids begging for a snack they could easily get themselves. She is quietly mouthing dirty words to keep you excited yet the children’s cries for Doritos are not only distracting but also making you want Doritos. Neither of you can keep a straight face as the children start asking questions about what’s taking so long.
Squeaky bed springs