When it comes to going to the bathroom, I thought that everyone used toilet paper. Seeing as there are dozens of brands on the market, there’s literally something for everyone (some like it soft, double layered, etc). But, after working on the web for a few years, I’ve come to learn that there are some families who are straight up bizarre. I’m never going to be over the families who use “poop knives” to cut their way-too-big-turds in half before flushing, and it’ll haunt me until the day I die. Now, there’s something equally as strange floating around the web–family cloths.
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It basically is exactly what it sounds like–instead of using toilet paper, some families use “washable, reusable” cloths to wipe after using the bathroom. Essentially, you use it the same way you use toilet paper just without throwing it in the toilet and flushing. Instead, you’d throw it into a hamper to be washed like a washcloth. It sounds super eco-friendly and cheap (if you’re looking to cut corners), but, I’m not 100% on board with this. Won’t the hamper smell like pee? What if you have to poop? Do you use a family cloth to wipe your butt and then throw that into the hamper to stink up your entire bathroom?
I’ve seen threads on Reddit discuss family cloths, but the original posters always end up deleting them because the entire site comes down on them hard for being–well weird. Recently, BuzzFeed spoke with a mom who uses “family cloths” in their home, and, it still sounds as gross as you’d think it does. She claims she’s the one who put her entire family onto the family cloth idea, and, it’s worked well for them.
So far, it’s been wonderful and I can’t imagine going back. We often hear metaphorical talk like ‘Buying ________ is like flushing money down the toilet.’ But in my mind, buying and using disposable toilet paper was literally flushing money down the toilet! If you’re wondering, ‘Why would you want to reuse something that you wipe your genitals with?’, I’d answer this question with my own question: ‘Do you throw away your underpants after each use?’
But, this family doesn’t use the “family cloths” for poop. Instead, they use baby wipes first and then pat dry with a family cloth. But, there are many eco-friendly bloggers online who do use the family cloth for poop, too. Many claim it’s “more relaxing” and “feels better” than using toilet paper, which can be harsh on your butt. To me–that’s way too much. You’d letting poop smeared cloths sit in a hamper in your bathroom. It seems unhygienic and smelly and straight up disgusting. I also don’t want to wipe myself with something someone else has wiped their ass with–even after it’s been washed. It just makes me cringe.
While it seems to be a “good idea” for being environmentally friendly, in all reality I can’t wrap my head around thinking it is. Thinking about it realistically, if you have more than one person living in your home, you have to do twice as much laundry twice as often because you use the bathroom several times a day. Not everyone’s pee smells like “roses,” so when the hamper is opened to add more dirty cloths, the stink will take over your entire bathroom (especially if it’s small). You really shouldn’t wash your underwear with your other clothes, in case fecal matter spreads (bacteria, y’all), so you probably won’t be washing these family cloths with your other laundry either–even more water/energy wasted. Not to mention, you have to spend twice as much on detergent. All in all, this is a horrible idea and it should be banned in every country far and near. Twitter agrees with me, thank God.
ahhhh family cloth, my one true enemy https://t.co/eTk3f2R9K8
— Nicole Cliffe (@Nicole_Cliffe) March 9, 2018
This morning I learned about "family cloth" and now I'm suing you all.
— Wario Van Peebles (@B1andzig) March 10, 2018
That's gonna be a no from me, dawghttps://t.co/36dihMNbQb
— Scott might not follow you back, okay? (@Adequate_Scott) March 9, 2018
Just wash your ass you dirty damn Gora https://t.co/wTkopMJ43o
— Davis Khan (@malwaex) March 9, 2018
Karyn and I on the whole "family cloth" thing:
K: "what if you walked into someone's house and they had this?"
Both of us at the same time: "I would leave."
— Elyse Explosion 💣💥 (@elyseexplosion) March 10, 2018
I'm too lazy to keep my tupperware clean. I am not up to this.
— Rodeo Owner (@magneticksara) March 9, 2018
— Lindsey Frances (@lindsfrances) March 9, 2018
these people belong in jail
— baby d (@deanna_havas) March 9, 2018
— Rene (@rothko_fan) March 9, 2018